Don’t Give Up

FIVE YEARS Y’ALL!!!! For 5 long miscarriage-filled years we waited for God to fulfill His promise to us for a baby from my womb. Our fertility journey had so many ups and downs. We went through every emotion and sought God harder than ever before. That ttc (trying to conceive) season of our lives was that of pain and triumph.

My TTC Story

We knew we had confirmation from Jesus that I would be pregnant and carry our child. That was in 2016. Then in 2019, I heard Jesus say to me, “You will adopt from the fruit of your womb.” And, to be perfectly honest, I had no idea what that meant. But I KNEW I had heard from Jesus.

I stood on that word and spoke it over my life no matter what my circumstances produced. I knew I heard it but the long wait made me want to give up so many times. Holy Spirit would gently remind me that I had heard from God. Even so, I battled doubt endlessly!! You can read more about overcoming doubt here.

Our heart’s cry for years and years was for my husband & I to raise the baby God chose for us to raise. We both loved the idea of adoption and, being a blended family, we knew we could navigate the emotional side of adoption. Our hearts were ready, we were both praying and we both heard confirmation from God. Let’s do this!!! I was 40 at the time Brett was 44 and because of our ages I just assumed it would happen FAST! 

Giving Up Is Not An Option

Then the wait ensued…and we waited and waited. And waited. After grieving three children (each lost at 10 weeks pregnant) our hearts were weary and ready to give up. Not to mention we had five failed adoptions through our adoption agency over the five years. But we said, “ONE MORE TIME!” I think it was out of sheer determination and full faith in our God of miracles that kept us going. I want to encourage you to not give up either. Your baby is coming!

We were led to embryo adoption and it has been a more beautiful story than we could have ever imagined. Our Christmas miracle girl was born in late December!!! Five years later. Five years AFTER we heard YES from Jesus. 

Joining Together

We stay in touch with our fellow embryo batch families and we decided to meet up at the local pumpkin patch this fall. Brett and I always wanted an open adoption and I have to tell you that it is even more incredible than we could have imagined. To be surrounded by other families who understand fighting for fertility because they walked a similar path to us has been wonderful. And, to know that my daughter will know her embryo siblings has been an answer to prayer. Her miracle story is so beautiful.

 We cherish the way God brought us all together. Our excitement about our daughter’s future is reinforced when we hang out with these families. We are blown away by what waiting on God can produce!!

Waiting On Jesus To Answer

To my friends in the fertility battle, don’t give up! Your miracle is coming too!! Waiting on Jesus always produces fruit. You can trust Jesus because He is faithful. I know it’s hard. Waiting for my daughter was equally as hard as waiting 12 years for my husband and our boys. But, there’s grace and so much to learn on the journey 

13 I would have despaired had I not believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord
In the land of the living.
14 Wait for and confidently expect the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for and confidently expect the Lord.

Psalm 27:13-14, Amplified Bible

Incredible Faith

Imagine the possibilities when you put your own agenda aside and you’re relying on only Him. Like, “Jesus if Your plan doesn’t work we’ve got nothing!!” I want to challenge you to live in that “It’s Him or nothing” kind of faith!!! This incredible faith can be yours if you ask Jesus for it in prayer. You got this!!

Here’s the scripture I stood on through all the miscarriages and what I thought were broken promises…Psalm 30:11. I put this verse as the screensaver on my laptop so I would see it every morning. It reminded me that ONE DAY Jesus would answer. And, now I am living in that day.

11 Then he broke through and transformed all my wailing into a whirling dance of ecstatic praise! He has torn the veil and lifted from me the sad heaviness of mourning. He wrapped me in the glory-garments of gladness.

Psalm 30:11, TPT

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